Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
