So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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