i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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