guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
