question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
