is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Randomize
