Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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