I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
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