i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Randomize
