some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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