Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
