i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Randomize
