I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
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