You just made me feel so damn special
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
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