Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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