if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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