That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
