is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Randomize
