there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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