so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize