people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize