Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Randomize
