She's JV to your varsity
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
