I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
they're like a gay fantastic four
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
And then my night got REAL pukey
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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