hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Randomize
