You're my little dorito
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
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