I want to have your abortion
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
