My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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