just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
