Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I still have a little drunk in my system
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Randomize
