I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
My vagina just recognized that song.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Randomize