I am full of burrito and curiosity
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Randomize
