i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
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