i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
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