Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Blood and glitter go together right?
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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