If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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