Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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