Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
