There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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