Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
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