these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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