I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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