you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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