do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
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