I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize