He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
This is classic penis vs brain.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize