Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
