omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
