Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
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