it hurts more in the daytime
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
