Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
