the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
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